Wednesday, 11 July 2012

Epic fail

I had a smidgeon of spare time last night so I decided to give that first Epic mission another go now that I know what I'm supposed to do. Wiping out enough mines proved pretty easy, and I was soon on my way down to the planet's surface to take out the radar station. It didn't take long to find it (it was smack in the middle of the map), so I zoomed up and started blasting - mindful of the fact I was on a timer and it was counting down fast. I spent an age shooting at it and...nothing happened. Time ran out and the mission ended. I tried again; same thing. I tried again and again but didn't seem to be able to do any damage to the radar dish. I re-read the mission description in the manual and lo and behold in the last sentence it does make passing reference to the fact that there just might be some kind of force field around the radar. So, try again, through the minefield, back to the planet and this time rushing around trying to find a forcefield generator. After a bit of aimless wandering I found something that looked suspicious (the name on the missile lock screen just says "unknown"), so I did what all good heroes do and shot it. Bang goes the building and up goes the completion percentage - I'm on the right track! And then the timer runs out and I die. So I try again, safe in the knowledge that I know what to do this time. Through the minefield, down to the planet, kill unknown, yay! My completion percentage has only gone up by about 4%, so I figure there are more of these generators around. I fly around to find the next one and...time runs out. Death. This is getting less and less fun by the second. I soon find out that by some glitch in the game logic, if you crash your plane then you lose a life and the timer is reset (normally when the timer runs out it ends the mission no matter how many lives you  have left). Actually, the game does justify the lives thing, it's actually ships rather than lives. You're just a nameless, expendable pilot, but what matters is the golden ship that you're flying. It's made from the miraculous "epical material", and they only had enough of the material to build three ships - hence your three tries. Works for me. Anyway, with this new knowledge I was able to fly around and find a few more generators (note that you have extremely limited fuel, too, so aimlessly flying round wastes both fuel and time - they really didn't want you to win this game). I destroyed all the generators I could find and got my completion percentage up somewhere around 90% - time to hit the radar, thought I. But when I got there the radar had disappeared. I could clearly see where it used to be, but there was no sign of it...What?!?! And then the timer ran out and I died.

I'm afraid to say that after that I rage quit and called it a night. I woke up this morning wondering if maybe the radar had blown up because I'd been knocking out all the generators - overloading its power or something - and maybe there were just a couple more "unknown" buildings that I had to find and hit and the level would be over. So I turned on the computer and then remembered that I hadn't just rage quit last night, I'd rage quit and deleted the game. Oh well, I wasn't enjoying it that much anyway. On to its sequel, Inferno, voted the 44th worst game of all time by Computer Gaming World. Yay! I tried to install it this morning, but it keeps complaining about a missing file. I'll give it another go later, but it looks like I might not even get to try it.

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