Friday, 4 May 2018

You can Keep your Shoppe

Well, Shoppe Keep is just turdy. In a strange piece of synchronicity, the sequel has just come out today, and I can tell you now that it's a game that I won't be buying (please remind me of that the next time it turns up in a bundle). It's incredibly user-unfriendly, and incredibly tedious. The 'tutorial' is so bad that I had to use a wiki to work out how to even begin. I forgot to say, this is a game that was published in the last couple of years, not in the '80s. You essentially have to build and run a weapons shop in a fantasy land, and this is very much about the management aspects of said shop. You have to plan your display area, buy stock, manage prices and stock levels, and so on. If that sounds tedious to you, then you think the same way as I do. In my first day (which seemed to take a long time), I made 6 gold pieces in profit. Now, I'm sure you probably do start slow and build your way up the ladder to greater things, but that's way slower that I'm happy to start. That's not even enough to buy a single extra item at the end of the day. That's just dull. And what do you do all day? Nothing. You stand there waiting for customers, and when someone buys something you order a replacement and, when it comes through, you put it back on the same pedestal. Fun. Actually, there is some excitement when you get robbed. I had 3 robberies in the first day. When you get robbed, you chase after the culprit (you can run much faster than they can) and you hit them once with your sword. They then fall over and you pick up the object they took from you and traipse back to your shop where you return it to its place on the pedestal. Then you go back to standing and waiting for people to come in and buy something. God it's dull. I'm sure there are more options that open up when you have more money, and the game gets a bit more exciting (at least I hope it does), but to get that far I'd have to play the game for another few hours, and there's no way I'm doing that. Sorry. And I thought Prehistorik was going to be my worst game of the year. Onwards!

Next up on the randometer is...Blind Justice! Never heard of it. Looks like a mid-'90s RPG, so worth a shot.

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